Advent Expectancy and Motherhood

Hello ladies! 

I’m excited to finally venture into this intriguing world of blogging.  I do believe that this is the first time I have ever posted on any blog (add this to the growing list of ‘things I never thought I’d do after I joined the convent’…it keeps growing…). 

By way of brief introduction, my name is Sr. Anna Rose, and I work here on campus with Women’s Ministry, which means, well, a whole host of things, but it includes working with the Women’s Ministry team here on campus – this blog is one of the outreaches of this team of beautiful women.  I entered the Franciscan Sisters, TOR, a little over three years ago, and have just begun ministry here on campus this semester (you can read my full vocation story here). 

One thing that has been on my heart to share with you ladies is the beautiful reality of motherhood.  Obviously, this time of year tends to get us thinking about it a bit more than usual as images of the Madonna and Child are displayed everywhere before our eyes, so it seems.  And I love this!  For me, I’ve also been thinking a lot about one of my younger sisters, Melanie, who is currently pregnant with her second child.  MeI and her husband Paul were married about the time I entered community, and since then, as we’ve both spent the past three years growing into and learning about our respective vocations, she has consistently been teaching me about my own vocation. 

What? 

Yes, my married sister is teaching me how to be (God-willing) a more faithful religious sister. 

I could go into a whole host of reasons for this, but I will cite only one example that is particularly imprinted on my mind.  A few months after she gave birth to her first child, Dominic (who I maintain, in a completely unbiased way, is the most adorable child to walk the face of the earth), Mel was able to come down to our Motherhouse, where I was living at the time, for a visit.   

Dominic, in all his precious, adorable cuteness

Besides this being my first time meeting my nephew, this was also the first time I got to observe Mel being a mom.  It was awesome, and moved me deeply in a way that I was not expecting (I was partially just concerned about not making the baby cry when I held him for the first time…first impressions are important!).  Anyway, at the end of our visit that evening, I remember walking back to my room, mesmerized by the almost surreal images playing through my mind of watching Mel interact with her son.  And the simple but beautifully profound phrase ran through my head: “she would give her life for him.  She would die for him.”  It was one of those ‘I know this to be true at the depths of my soul’ truths.  And it moved me profoundly. 

This truth did not strike me because of anything she necessarily said or even did.  Just the simple reality of watching her interact with him communicated to me that she had a connection to this new, tiny human being that was unlike her connection to any of the rest of us.  His life will always be bound to hers in a singular and particular way, and her life will never be the same, because of him.  This tiny person, not because of anything he did, but because of his very existence, had radically changed my sister. 

And so it brought the question to my own mind – am I allowing myself to be radically changed like this?  Obviously, as a religious sister, I take a vow of celibate chastity, and so offer to the Lord the good of having biological children of my own, for the greater good of undivided devotion to the Lord as my Spouse, and the spiritual children He desires to give me.  And so I was challenged to ask myself: am I open to the new life the Lord desires to give to me – and would I lay down my life for them?  It’s a question I continue to ask myself on a consistent basis. 

Because, ladies, the truth is that regardless of where we are now, and whatever vocation we are in, or discerning, or feeling called to at this particular moment, we are always called to be receptive to new life that the Lord desires to give us, and to nurture it – this is inherent to who we are as women.  John Paul II tells us that:

“The moral and spiritual strength of a woman is joined to her awareness that God entrusts the human being to her in a special way. Of course, God entrusts every human being to each and every other human being. But this entrusting concerns women in a special way - precisely by reason of their femininity - and this in a particular way determines their vocation.”  (Mulieris Dignitatem 30)

It is every woman’s vocation to guard and nurture the lives of those around her.  The question of vocation should not be if God is calling me to be a mother, but how God is calling me to be a mother.  Each of you has a beautiful call that the Lord has placed on your life, and He’s calling you to live out this dimension of your femininity right now – with the people around you in class, with those at your work, with the women who live right next to you in the dorm, and with those whom you’ll encounter over Christmas break. 

John Paul II goes on to tell us that it’s precisely this awareness of how others are entrusted to us that makes us who we are:

“A woman is strong because of her awareness of this entrusting, strong because of the fact that God "entrusts the human being to her", always and in every way…this awareness and this fundamental vocation speak to women of the dignity which they receive from God himself, and this makes them "strong" and strengthens their vocation.” (Mulieris Dignitatem 30)

We are strong by the very fact that the Lord has deigned to entrust others to us.  This is not often the definition that the world gives us of the word ‘strong,’ and certainly not of a “strong woman.”  But this is how the Lord desires us to be strong: by receiving from Him those He desires to entrust to us, and by making a gift of self to them in return.  This is real empowerment.

So as we journey with Mary and Joseph during these days of expectancy and ‘getting ready,’ I encourage you to live with a heightened awareness of your own dignity in the gift the Lord has given you in your femininity. Consider specifically how the Lord has entrusted others to you, and you to others.  We were not made to live in isolation, but in communion with one another.  Like I said earlier, I am consistently challenged by the example of Mel, and her husband Paul, and the self-sacrifice that they live out in their lives .It’s through the ordinary, mundane ‘dying’ to self that I see the desire to give the fullness of one’s life for the other – the self-gift that we are all called to, regardless of our particular vocation.  May each of us embrace our call to be that complete gift of self for the other, and to be the mothers that the Lord has called us to be.  

In that Love which is God,

Sr. Anna Rose 

PS – This blog would not be complete without a shameless plug (although completely unsolicited by her, for the record) for my sister’s blog, http://muchmadnessblog.wordpress.com/ , where she shares her thoughts on everything from current events, mom adventures, Sesame Street, JPII, and, as she says, “all the Catholic things.”

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Sr. Anna Rose is our fearless leader here at Women's Ministry. If you see her around campus you should probably give her a hug or round of applause for all of the amazing work she is doing for all the women of Franciscan. Her story, as mentioned earlier, can be found here, and we would really encourage you to check it out. As always, we encourage you to offer her and all of Women's Ministry up in your prayers, and please know that we are lifting you up in ours!

"Love Demands the Perfecting of the Beloved"

Dear sisters,

I know this may come as a shock to some of you, but we are only human. And as humans sometimes we mess up…really really badly. For me this usually happens by saying something uncharitable or saying something in an uncharitable way to another person.

But sometimes in our life we are fortunate enough to have people tell us when we really mess up. These are the people that call us out and tell us “Badly done.”

I can’t help but think of Jane Austen’s book Emma, when Mr. Knightly calls Emma out for being very rude to another lady.

Certainly receiving such an honest reprimand is not fun for anyone. In fact, sometimes we can be very hurt when another calls us out, especially because the person that usually does it is very close to us and we value their opinion of us.

One has to notice that it is only those who are really close to us that will call us out when we do wrong. It is often only a parent or a very dear friend that will risk it. It is also only a very good parent or friend who loves you enough as a person to correct you so that you can be the best possible version of yourself.

As C.S. Lewis eloquently puts it in his book The Problem of Pain, “Love, in its own nature, demands the perfecting of the beloved….Love may, indeed, love the beloved when her beauty is lost: but not because it is lost.”

Who loves us more than God? He is the good friend or parent that constantly calls us out when we fail to live up to the greatness we were created for. We hear His voice through our conscience’s tug on our heart.

God corrects us when we’re out of line. He does so not because he is a bad parent (in the sense that “good parents have children that never misbehave”) or because he does not love us. In fact, God disciplines his children precisely because he loves them. In this sense, God is the best of parents.

Paul reminds us in his letter to the Hebrews, “For whomever the Lord loves, he chastises. And every son whom he accepts, he scourges. Persevere in discipline. God presents you to himself as sons. But what son is there, whom his father does not correct? But if you are without that discipline in which all have become sharers, then you are of adultery, and you are not sons.” (Hebrews 12:6-8)

This does not mean that receiving correction is ever an easy thing, even when it comes from God. In fact, being disciplined can hurt so much that we, the child, might turn away from our Father and never come back.

The point is that God as the loving parent disciplines anyway. Parents would be irresponsible if they did not speak truth to their children. The hard part is that sometimes speaking that truth means telling the child that what they’re doing is wrong.

There are many cases where upon hearing this news the child turns away and cuts off any relationship with their parent. The good parent, knowing this is a very real possibility due to their child’s free will, proceeds with speaking that truth anyway.

When it comes to our faith, this is a scenario that has played out repeatedly throughout history. As human people, we (the members of the Church) stray from truth. It’s not usually done maliciously. In fact, it’s usually done with the best of intentions. However, this does not relieve our Father and his bride the Church (who is our mother) from pointing out and attempting to correct the error of their children’s ways.

It is because the Church is a truly loving and good mother that she points out when her children have strayed. Her intention is never to cause a divide. A mother never wishes to see her family become broken but she knows this is a very real possibility.

In these cases she takes Christ as a model. When Jesus was speaking to the crowd (among whom were many Jewish scholars) about his identity as the Bread of Life and that the bread that he will give for the life of the world is his flesh, the Jewish people murmured among themselves (John 6). Many said this was a hard teaching, one they could not believe, and so they walked away. Jesus at this moment did not say, “Come back!” and then amend or “soften” his teaching. He watched them go. He LET them go. Was it hard to see his children reject the truth he was trying to share with them? I’m sure it was.

But the point is that Jesus didn’t let that hurt, or even the POSSIBILITY of that hurt, prevent him from loving his children. Because he loved his children he shared the Truth with them.

Because God is a loving Father he gives us standards by which we are to live our lives. The Church, as Christ’s loving bride and our mother, cooperates with her husband in enforcing these standards even if it means their children may run away. Does it pain them every second that their child is away? Yes. But that doesn’t mean that they go back on their discipline or force their child to stay against their will.

Does this mean that when her children come back broken and sinful that the Church turns them away? Never. She rejoices with her husband that their prodigal children have come home. She cleans them off and invites them in to the feast. Yes, she insists that they clean their hands before the feast and she holds firm on that command, but she never will force her child to wash his hands and attend the banquet if that is not the place where the child wants to be.

It is important to remember that the Church demands much from us precisely because she loves us. These words often sound hollow when we hear them because we know that we fall short and are often content to stay that way. We often ask, “Why can’t the Church be content with me the way I am right now? Why does she demand that I constantly seek a deeper holiness, a deeper charity, a deeper conversion?”

C.S. Lewis answers this question when he continues that, “To ask that God’s love should be content with us as we are is to ask that God should cease to be God: because He is what He is, His love must, in the nature of things, be impeded and repelled by certain stains in our present character, and because He already loves us He must labour to make us lovable. We cannot even wish, in our better moments, that He could reconcile Himself to our present impurities…What we would here and now call our ‘happiness’ is not the end God chiefly has in view: but when we are such as He can love without impediment, we shall in fact be happy.”

Sisters, continue to fight the good fight. At this point in the semester we may ask “What’s the point? Why should I even try to do a good job on this paper/test?” We are being called on to greatness by our professors, advisers, and priests. This call towards correction and conversion may make us want to turn away.

But hold on.

They are calling you on out of love. Have enough faith in that love to continue to hope for mercy and rest.

In the Fire of His Love,

Alyssa
Instaurare Omnia in Christo

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Alyssa is a sophomore studying Humanities and Catholic Culture, Theology, and Philosophy. She is a native of Texas where she lives with her family in a blue-roofed house on top of a hill. She is passionate about the Truth of the Lord's Incarnation and loves spending time discovering and discussing ways in which others have incarnated the Gospel in film, history, literature, politics, and art. Her favorite saints are St. Teresa of Avila and St. Catherine of Siena because they both personify St. John Paul II's "feminine genius" in her mind.

Personal Reflections on Mary: Caretaker of Christ & Queen of Heaven

Dear sisters,

Meet Mary, the comforter of the manliest man, our Lord Jesus. 

The Gift of Mary’s Discipleship

Mary is the light for the downtrodden, oppressed, and discriminated against. Our Lady of Hope isa beautiful model of motherhood and discipleship. To truly imitate this discipleship is to allow the grace of God to overflow in our hearts, and respond accordingly. We have so much to learn from Mary, and God gives us the grace to be able to imitate her devotion to Him. Think about it.  We have the possibility to be like Mary, as the caretaker of Christ. What would happen if we were the caretakers of Christ?

A Caretaker of Christ

        Let’s imagine seeing ourselves as caretakers of Christ. Our relationships with Him would change: we would spend more time thinking about God, we would blame Him less, we would not take our fortunes as signs of His favor or displeasure, and we would put in more effort to make the world a more peaceful place. What does this look like in your life?        

 As caretakers of Christ, we would become much more aware of God’s divine presence being anywhere and everywhere – in us at all times.  As stewards who live in the world, but not of the world, it is our obligation to put effort into making the world a more holy place, as we strive to be like Mary, as caretaker of the Lord Our God.

Mary Links Us To Her Son

Instead of doing anything for herself, all her actions are for Him, because as His mother she desires her Son to be made known. She does not seek the feelings she got as she saw her Son being scourged and nailed to the Cross, but accepts the sorrow that enters her heart. As we sin, the Lord is whipped and beaten as he was during His time on earth - it hurts Him to see us sin.  This is why Mother Mary’s intercession is so powerful: she connects and strengthens our relationship with her Son, so that we might be open to the grace He gives us to overcome sin.  Our turn away from sin, towards His Heart is a salve to His wounds and softens the suffering He undergoes as a result of the world’s sin.  Mary’s Heart too, united with Her Son’s, is consoled as her children come to Her Son.

Mary’s Intercession as Queen of Heaven

            If anyone can put a good word for us, it is our Lady, Mary.  She reigns high in the Heavens between the saints and Christ Himself in the chain of ascendance toward God. Because of the great submission and love shown by Mary, her requests and influence is so powerful with the Lord that He readily fulfills them.  He does not resist His dear mother’s desires. However, the Queen of Heaven is not a strong intercessor in the sense that she can change God’s mind according to what we want, but in the sense that she conforms her children’s prayers according to His plan; her prayers and intercession are strong because she is united to the Father’s will. 

Mary’s guidance and aid is more powerful than that of all the angels and saints because she is Queen of them!  By God’s desire, she has been given authority over the saints and angels and tasked to assign the thrones of Heaven to the angels and saints, made vacant by the apostate angels who fell away through pride. 

Mary's Magnificat

So Christ has made her Queen of Heaven and earth, and given her so much power…yet she remains so humble!  She does not attempt to overshadow the Lord; instead, all she desires and works toward is for the Father’s will to be fulfilled.

“My soul proclaims the greatness of the Lord;

my spirit rejoices in God my savior.

For he has looked upon his handmaid’s lowliness;

behold, from now on will all ages call me blessed.

The Mighty One has done great things for me,

and holy is his name.

His mercy is from age to age to those who fear him.

He has shown might with his arm,

dispersed the arrogant of mind and heart.

He has thrown down the rulers from their thrones

but lifted up the lowly.

The hungry he has filled with good things;

the rich he has sent away empty.

He has helped Israel his servant,

remembering his mercy,

according to his promise to our fathers,

to Abraham and to his descendants forever.”

Luke 1:46-55

Mother Mary’s powerful intercession and model of discipleship is a result of her submissiveness to the Lord’s will, her humility, and her love of God. She is able to live out these virtues through God’s graces and also through her perspective as the Mother of God. guides us to follow His will and overcome sin, so that she might alleviate even a drop of her Son’s suffering. As children of God, let us strive to see everything from the perspective of Mary, Mother of God, our own Mother as well. Let us use the ample grace she constantly offers us through her intercession to be comforters of the Lord, so that we might make Christ Her Son known.

My only pleasure would be to comfort you, my Sweet Savior.

In Mary's Arms,

Jillian

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Jillian is a sophomore studying Communications.  She fancies pugs, long walks on the beach, and has a mad talent for wedding photography, which she hopes to make a career of.  You'll often find her hanging out with Theotokos household, flipping pancakes, or snuggling with her friends.  Also, she loves Jesus through Mary!